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Jacob Linzenbold
Marlen Harrison
English 101
23 March 2009
My War Journal
August 27, 2008
Today was another day in hell. Having to tell the difference between the insurgents and the civilians is the most difficult thing I’ve ever done. An old lady came up to my roadblock today in an old family car. I asked her to step out of the vehicle so I could make sure she wasn’t carrying any explosives. The next thing I know she detonates the car and herself. The last sound I ever heard was my friend Mike screaming for the lady to hit the ground. Luckily for me I was 20 feet from the blast when I was giving the lady instructions. Mike wasn’t as lucky, today was the last day I’d ever get to see my best friend since being deployed. I am permanently deaf; the medic said I suffered from noise-induced hearing loss. ( NIHL )
August 28, 2008
I woke up today in the medic tent. They are still running tests but it’s certain that my hearing days are behind me. The doc is telling me that I need to learn to cope with what has happened. I’ve been blaming everyone around me for everything, when in reality im just feeling in secure because of my disability (cope). I really couldn’t give a fuck right now about my hearing though, since my best friend is never going to see the light of the day again…
August 30, 2008
Today I get to leave and go home. The funeral for Mike is going to be tomorrow, even though it’s a closed casket, at least I’ll get some closure. My family is devastated but very glad that I am still alive and not seriously injured other than my hearing. The worst part of the whole thing is never getting to hear my children and my wife’s voice.
September 2, 2008
It’s been a few days since my last entry since I’ve been so busy. I went to the funeral and paid my respects. Afterwards I just enjoyed my family’s company. We sat around and tried to communicate. A therapist insisted that my family and I learn sign language so that we have an easier way to communicate. I am beginning to realize that this is going to be a long and very difficult road to go down…
September 10, 2008
Today is another tough day for me; I’ve been trying to learn sign language the past week but I am not getting very far. I am embracing this entire process, but as the saying goes you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. I hope that one day soon I can interact with my family like I used to, always telling jokes and laughing. Of course things will never be exactly the same but I really want to try and recapture what we had.
October 3, 2008
It’s been about three weeks since my last entry, and things are looking up at the moment. I’ve learned most of the basic words in sign language and I am getting better at reading lips. I get to tell my family through my sign language that I love them every morning. Learning this system of communication is very complex. Sign language is independent of the English language, meaning a whole new set of rules to learn (SignLang). This learning process was much more difficult than learning a spoken language.
July 10, 2009
The last 8 or so months for me really taught me the importance of life. All of my other senses are intact and are much stronger. I wouldn’t say that I’m glad that I went deaf, but it has definitely changed my outlook on things. I don’t take anything for granted and live each day to the fullest. Nothing is like hearing; I miss music and my wife’s soft voice. But, as a human and a soldier I have really learned to adapt to my situation and am making the best of it. Since sound and hearing are all just vibrations I’ve figured that it isn’t a completely necessary sense but it makes life much easier, but have always been one to take on a challenge. Whatever life throws at me, I’ll take the experiences with an open mind. I am still just glad to be alive, which is less than I can say for my old friend. The main thing I’ve learned from this whole ordeal is that my family will always support me and be with me on everything that I do.
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Jacob Linzenbold
Marlen Harrison
English 101
23 March 2009
My War Journal
August 27, 2008
Today was another day in hell. Having to tell the difference between the insurgents and the civilians is the most difficult thing I’ve ever done. An old lady came up to my roadblock today in an old family car. I asked her to step out of the vehicle so I could make sure she wasn’t carrying any explosives. The next thing I know she detonates the car and herself. The last sound I ever heard was my friend Mike screaming for the lady to hit the ground. Luckily for me I was 20 feet from the blast when I was giving the lady instructions. Mike wasn’t as lucky, today was the last day I’d ever get to see my best friend since being deployed. I am permanently deaf; the medic said I suffered from noise-induced hearing loss. ( NIHL )
August 28, 2008
I woke up today in the medic tent. They are still running tests but it’s certain that my hearing days are behind me. The doc is telling me that I need to learn to cope with what has happened. I’ve been blaming everyone around me for everything, when in reality im just feeling in secure because of my disability (cope). I really couldn’t give a fuck right now about my hearing though, since my best friend is never going to see the light of the day again…
August 30, 2008
Today I get to leave and go home. The funeral for Mike is going to be tomorrow, even though it’s a closed casket, at least I’ll get some closure. My family is devastated but very glad that I am still alive and not seriously injured other than my hearing. The worst part of the whole thing is never getting to hear my children and my wife’s voice.
September 2, 2008
It’s been a few days since my last entry since I’ve been so busy. I went to the funeral and paid my respects. Afterwards I just enjoyed my family’s company. We sat around and tried to communicate. A therapist insisted that my family and I learn sign language so that we have an easier way to communicate. I am beginning to realize that this is going to be a long and very difficult road to go down…
September 10, 2008
Today is another tough day for me; I’ve been trying to learn sign language the past week but I am not getting very far. I am embracing this entire process, but as the saying goes you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. I hope that one day soon I can interact with my family like I used to, always telling jokes and laughing. Of course things will never be exactly the same but I really want to try and recapture what we had.
October 3, 2008
It’s been about three weeks since my last entry, and things are looking up at the moment. I’ve learned most of the basic words in sign language and I am getting better at reading lips. I get to tell my family through my sign language that I love them every morning. Learning this system of communication is very complex. Sign language is independent of the English language, meaning a whole new set of rules to learn (SignLang). This learning process was much more difficult than learning a spoken language.
July 10, 2009
The last 8 or so months for me really taught me the importance of life. All of my other senses are intact and are much stronger. I wouldn’t say that I’m glad that I went deaf, but it has definitely changed my outlook on things. I don’t take anything for granted and live each day to the fullest. Nothing is like hearing; I miss music and my wife’s soft voice. But, as a human and a soldier I have really learned to adapt to my situation and am making the best of it. Since sound and hearing are all just vibrations I’ve figured that it isn’t a completely necessary sense but it makes life much easier, but have always been one to take on a challenge. Whatever life throws at me, I’ll take the experiences with an open mind. I am still just glad to be alive, which is less than I can say for my old friend. The main thing I’ve learned from this whole ordeal is that my family will always support me and be with me on everything that I do.
